When my Self is in Control

MyLife Essay Contest 2015

Introduction

A challenge I face every morning before entering my classroom is to think of ways to make the Chassidic discourse I’m about to teach relatable and applicable to my students – young men from various backgrounds, many of whom are being exposed to the teachings of Chassidus for the first time. There are many sections of Chassidus whose application is immediately apparent. But other sections use terms that seem abstract or esoteric and not obviously applicable, however when properly explained they can become accessible, stimulating, and inspiring.

One example is a discourse that has become iconic in our generation; the ma’amar Bosi L’gani 5710. Parts of the discourse have an obvious impact with clear lessons in our lives. But the central statement, a quote from the Zohar which forms the basis of its development, can remain somewhat aloof.

The Zohar says “when you do ‘iskafia’ to the ‘sitra achra’ (“bend” unholiness – so that it is not blocking what is “inside”) then Hashem’s honor and presence is increased in all of the worlds.” To properly appreciate this statement there are two things we have to explain. Firstly, what are the “different worlds”? And second, the ma’amar emphasizes that the G-dly presence that is increased is that which is called “soveiv” (surrounding) as opposed to “memalei” (filling). What do these terms mean, and how do they become real in my life?

“Filling” the World

‘Memalei’, which literally means something that fills, refers to the energy of creation that fills every single existence according to its individual nature and characteristic. To draw an analogy from our bodies, each part of our body has a unique function and is animated with the energy it needs to perform its function. From a ‘memalei’ standpoint, there are vast differences between the various parts of the body, for example between the heart, the pinky, and the little toe. Not only do they require very different energy levels, and have extremely different roles in the body’s function, they also do not represent the same consequence to the person’s vitality. In creation there are also different levels that are vastly different from each other. Each has a unique role and a distinct energy is needed to vitalize it.

Four worlds

Specifically, there are four worlds, one deeper than the other, each representing a different stage of Hashem’s self-concealment to allow room for separate existence. Let’s use a puppeteer as an example. His objective is to conceal himself as much as possible, allowing the puppet to entertain the audience by appearing self-animated. The puppet then seems as if it is a creature propelled entirely on its own. This corresponds to the “outermost” world of ‘asiya’, where everything appears to exist on its own, and there doesn’t seem to be anything causing its existence.

If, however, the puppeteer’s hand is visible, poking out from under the puppet, then although the puppet’s performance is still the same, it is glaringly evident that someone is propelling it. This corresponds to the world of ‘yetzirah’ where angels and souls, while having their own identities, are cognizant of their source.

Deeper still is the world of ‘briah’ which can be compared to a transparent puppet. The puppet is there, but all that can be seen is the hand. In the world of ‘briah’ none of the creatures stand out as separate from the energy which generates their existence, such that the only thing perceived is the generating force.

Finally, the deepest, innermost world is ‘atzilus’. In ‘atzilus’ there is only a hand. The hand makes all the motions of the puppet, but there is no puppet. This is because the world of ‘atzilus’, while going through all the “motions” of being a world, is just pure G-dliness without any separate ingredients.

All these are the different levels of “memalei”.

One View – Different Perspectives

If you look at the puppet from the “inside out” first there is just the hand, then as you become farther removed from it you gradually reach a perspective where all you see is the puppet. In the evolution of creation as well, first there is just the “hand of G-d” and then as you gradually increase your distance you reach a level where the only thing perceived is the world.

Clearly, on a ‘memalei’ level, G-dliness can be far more “felt” and “seen” in ‘atzilus’ than in any of the “outer” worlds. The objective though remains this world – ‘asiya’ – where instinctively we only recognize our own existence. This is because Hashem wants us to see through the facade. Just like an audience would not be so foolish as to applaud the puppet at the end of the performance, Hashem wants us, as the audience, to reach the awareness that He is the One pulling the strings.

A glimpse of what’s inside

Hashem does not want to be seen in this world as He is in ‘atzilus’, for that would defeat the gradual progression between the different worlds (that would eliminate the puppet). Hashem wants a deeper identity to become apparent, one that doesn’t reverse the concealment in this world. We are to recognize Hashem inside of existence, like the personality of the puppeteer that can be seen in every expression and movement of the puppet. This deeper identity, representing the puppeteer, not any specific part of the puppet, is the level of ‘soveiv’.

Going back to the analogy of the body, while the heart demands far more energy than the pinky or the toe, that energy – the ‘memalei’ level – does not express the person’s identity. It is only amplifying the particular function of that specific part. In so much as the person’s identity is expressed in his body it can be found equally in every part of him. So when someone touches his friend with his pinky (or his toe, or his head etc.), he – the person himself – is touching his friend.

The person’s identity is deeper and greater than the sum total of his parts (which is ‘memalei’). That identity, the who he is rather than the what he is, that is ‘soveiv’. ‘Soveiv’ can’t be recognized in any of the external details. ‘Soveiv’ only becomes apparent when all the parts act according to an inner driving force, which is what is demonstrated through ‘iskafia’ (as we will explain).

Home sweet home

When a person (G-d forbid) does an ‘aveirah’ transgressing Hashem’s Will, he is in effect saying that he can make his own choices, and that the world is a self-existence. In other words he is applauding the puppet, by imagining it to be self-animated. He is thereby causing that Hashem’s identity (the identity of the true Cause as opposed to the perceived cause) in the world becomes more concealed. In effect he is “chasing Hashem away” from the world, by causing that He is not at home here.

Enter ‘iskafia’. When someone controls his desires and follows the direction of his G-dly soul, then instead of focusing on the external trappings of the “puppet”, he demonstrates that everything is part of a bigger whole and must play its part. Then, despite being in this world where all we see is the “puppet”, we are able to recognize the ‘soveiv’ identity of Hashem in all of creation.

In many attitudes ‘iskafia’ is perceived as a form of restraint, breaking one’s self and withholding one’s wants. This causes self-control to be a difficult challenge, because often the long term benefit of the restraint is overshadowed by the prospect of immediate gratification. In Chassidus however ‘iskafia’ becomes a positive exercise, because through ‘iskafia’ I am connecting 12to my true self; my ‘soveiv’ identity. It’s not denying myself, rather it is taking control of myself.

Of Horses and Men

We are born with an animal soul that naturally thinks it runs the show, because our G-dly soul can go nowhere without it. ‘Iskafia’ is to take the reins into our hands, and not to let the horse run wild. It is to give the animal direction and purpose.

‘Iskafia’ is therefore an empowering experience. It’s about taking control into my own hands, rather than letting my impulse control me. It is not about abstention or about not enjoying a pleasure, but rather about enjoying it with a purpose and a meaning.

For example, a person shouldn’t eat food just because he wants to. That is letting the ‘animal impulse’ pull him carelessly. Instead he should eat it because (and if) it is the “right” thing, and in the “right” way. He should wait for the proper time, (like waiting to eat it until after prayer). By making a blessing before and after he acknowledges the food’s Creator. And the pleasure derived from the food should not just be an empty enjoyment, but rather focused for a specific purpose, (such as to relax and concentrate on what he needs to do). All this brings out the inner dimension of the food instead of its external hull, so that instead of the food controlling the person, he is controlling it.

Same Ingredients, Different Results

In a bar there is alcohol, flashing lights, singing and good food. In the Jewish home on Friday night there is also sparkling wine spilling over the sides of a silver goblet, twinkling Shabbos candles, singing Shabbos songs, and a delicious meal. But in the bar there is a coarse and vulgar atmosphere, while in the Jewish home there is an aura of holiness and spirituality.

Because in the Jewish home there is ‘iskafia’ – meaning the elements in the home are being controlled and used towards a distinct purpose as opposed to being a purpose of their own. So the wine and lights and food are merely puppets, and the puppet master is felt through them.

When we do ‘iskafia’ the G-dly intent of creation, the energy of ‘soveiv’ – which is G-d’s “identity” inside of the world, is clearly felt, and this world becomes a home for Hashem.

Summary

The mamar teaches us that giving in to a ‘ta’vah’ (physical desire) for its own sake is spotlighting its outer shell and ignoring its deeper identity, thus “expelling” Hashem’s presence. To do iskafia is to demonstrate that I am in control. I, means my true identity – my ‘nefesh elokis’ -, and not just my instinctive nature (my ‘nefesh habahamis’). (It therefore does not mean not to have pleasure, rather it is not to have pleasure just because my ‘nefesh habahamis’ wants. This can be accomplished by delaying the fulfillment of the desire, or any other form of demonstrating that I am in control.) This in turn also brings out Hashem’s identity in creation (‘ohr hasoveiv kol almin’), because it accentuates how everything (including the object of pleasure) is part of a bigger whole.

Iskafia is always a struggle, or a battle of wills, and there is no magic pill to swallow that would make it a certain victory. But when the balance is between instant gratification and a distant abstract good, when the focus of iskafia is on holding back what I want now to become better or stronger in a different area, then the ‘yetzer hora’

has an increased ability to blind the person from the future or greater good and to cause him to see only the immediate pleasure. When the focus shifts however from eliminating or withholding the pleasure to taking control and not allowing the pleasure to define me then it becomes easier not to get distracted by temptation.

In different words; self-control becomes easier when instead of controlling my self it means giving my self control.