Choice: A G-dly Activity
Essays 2016
MyLife Essay Contest 2016
Introduction:
There are many choices we make in a day. ….. but why choose at all and how does a Jew make a choice?
If until now you thought that choosing was about weighing the pros and cons of the choice and then making your selection accordingly, this essay presents choosing as a G-dly activity, just like everything else a Jew does.
What is Choice?
According to the Rebbe:
(Sichos in English; 2nd day of Shavuos, 7th of Sivan 5743)
“….G-d chose the Jews……..
“…true choice means that nothing forces the choice: nothing superior shapes the choice, nor do the advantages of the chosen thing make any difference.
Freechoice means there are absolutely no reasons to choose one thing over another. It is simply chosen.
Two conclusions follow from this:
- …. Jews also have free choice, because Jews are made similar to G-d ….
- The choice made is not because of the advantages possessed by the chosen object…...
This means that choice has 2 aspects:
- We have choice in order to emulate our Creator.
- Choice is between 2 equal things.
Choice is about emulating our Creator:
In choosing, we are actually expressing our truth (emes). And emes, says the Rebbe, is
Hashem’s signature in this world (Sicha Vayehi 5736; section 6 – “חותמו של הקב”ה אמת”). It is never about the actual choice and always about the action of choosing. The objects of the choice are specific to each person. This is a person’s choice point. Everyone can emulate the Creator from their own choice point.
For example:
A ba’al teshuva may find his level of choice to be driving on Shabbos vs. staying home [and not driving], whereas for a veteran shomer shabbos person, driving is not even a question. For him, the level of choice may be between saying something at the shabbos table or deciding to keep quiet. I call this the choice point. The point that describes my truth. The point about which I am deliberating.
It is at this point, the point inside of me which is my truth, about which I make my choice, that I can emulate the Creator and choose.
Choice is between 2 equal things:
The other aspect of choice involves making the objects of that choice equal.
For example.
I need to choose between making dinner and reading a book. If the choices are not equal, in other words I really want to read that book but I know that I’d better make dinner………..the choices are weighted. Making dinner is a “have to” and reading is a “want to”, they are for sure not equal.
In this case, if I decide to make dinner, there can be resentment that I “have to” make dinner. If I choose to read the book, there can be guilt that I am reading a book when I think that I should make the dinner. This is a “lose-lose” situation. Whatever I pick, I feel bad. This is the result of choosing when the objects of choice are not equal.
They can only be equal when I say, “I want to” in both cases. I want to make dinner and I want to read a book.
But how can I want to make dinner? Just take the situation where someone offered to make me dinner for 2 weeks so that I could sit on the couch to read my book. Would I accept that offer? Probably not. Or if for some reason there was some medical condition that precluded my making dinner, wouldn’t I start to feel bad that I can’t make dinner? Of course I would. That means that on some level, I really want to make dinner.
The Rebbe says that “I want” is very powerful:
(Hayom Yom of Elul 2)
“… Ratzon (“will”) is a superior faculty that “issues decrees”, … the essential avoda is to arouse one’s will to exercise its effect.”
(sicha of Ki Teztze 5730 section 12)
“… כאשר העשייה נובעת מכח הרצון…….כך שיפעל ללא הגבלות”…
….when the actions are as a result of the power of “will” they are limitless.
So, only when I want to make dinner and I want to read a book, will I be able to choose without resentment or guilt.
In other words, if we could make every choice by “wanting to do it”, then the choices would be equal and we would set up a win-win situation, as whichever choice we make, we would be able to be 100% there, with no guilty conscience and no resentment.
Why choose?
Choice is clearly an opportunity. An opportunity for me to emulate Hashem. An opportunity that only I know about. An opportunity that is not anything “wow” that I can express to anyone else.
Without choice, we would be robots. If we always knew what to do there would be no purpose in designing us with a brain. Choice offers us a chance to think. Choice is not about right and wrong nor about bad and good. Choice is not about avoiding or creating consequences. Choice is about an opportunity to do something ‘G-d like’ in this world.
Let’s imagine “choice” like walking. When I walk I put one foot in front of the other. The foot that is behind is what keeps me stable while the front foot is trying to find its new stability. That’s what choice is about. One object is the stable one, and one is pushing forward, looking for that new place of truth and stability.
And just like in walking, both feet are good. So in choices, both choices are good. And the fact that one pushes me forward and the other keeps me balanced, allows me to move forward at my own pace. Both moving forward and staying where I am are good choices.
For example:
If my choice point is about taking that cigarette or saying no to that cigarette, the issue is not the smoking. It’s about my choices.
If I choose to not smoke when offered a cigarette I may not smoke but I have not changed my choice point. I remain at the choice point of smoking vs. quitting, every time the cigarette is offered. Here, even if I always refuse the cigarette, my choice point stays the same as the situation repeats itself. This is like choosing the “stable foot”.
On the other hand, if I decide that I am going to figure out what motivates me to smoke and try to change those motivators until I stop smoking, then at that point, when offered a cigarette, it will not even tempt me. Here it can take a long time to quit smoking, but my choice point has moved. Here, when I refuse the cigarette, it is from a different choice point. This is like choosing the “pushing forward foot” as I examine my motivators and change them as necessary.
This is the why of choices. Choice gives us an idea of where we are and where we can be. And the choice we make reflects my truth at that moment, but only to me.
One more example of choice to think about:
A boy wants to sleep-in. He feels like he has to go to school.
Is he ready to face his choice point?
Does he realize that he really wants to go to school? Does he realize that going to school and sleeping in are not equal in his mind? Does he realize that as long as these two choices are not equal, no matter what he decides to do he will feel bad?
If we apply what we have just learned, then he wants to sleep in and he wants to go to school on time.
If he can realize that both of these wants are his and both are good, he will be able to make a choice without resentment or guilt. And another time, he will be able to make a different choice!
Consequences:
Of course there are consequences to every choice we make.
That doesn’t mean that choosing as a Jew means to concentrate on those consequences when making a choice. Just like everything else that a Jew does in his/her daily life, choice too is an opportunity for us to emulate our Creator.
Can I just ignore my choice point and do things by rote or because it is the right thing to do or because someone tells me to do it? Aside from missing the opportunity to act as a Jew, I will be creating the space to blame someone else for the results. I will also not have to think for myself and I will avoid facing the fact that my level of choice is really a lot lower than I want to admit to myself.
And while thinking that I am not choosing, I am in fact choosing to not think, choosing to not take responsibility and/or choosing to avoid improving myself.
And like everything else we do, choosing in a Jewish way is something that takes a great deal of practice.
Conclusion:
So the next time we have a choice, let’s consider our own truth, our choice point. And let’s endeavour to make the choices equal. These choices are mine because this is me.
Then and only then, says the Rebbe:
(Sichos in English; 2nd day of Shavuos, 7th of Sivan 5743)
“… “You shall choose life.” …. Surely logic would compel a person to choose that which is life. Why then does Torah say, “You shall choose life,” as if there can be true unbiased choice between life and death?
However, although logic indeed compels one to go in the path of life, Torah still commands, “You shall choose life,” telling us that we should conduct ourselves in the right manner not because of logical compulsion, but out of free choice which transcends logic. “
So, when you can’t decide between making macaroni or rice for dinner, going to the wedding or the bar-mitzvah, making that call or going to bed early…….we can choose and feel good about ourselves knowing that we are acting Jewish. And then we can make our choices l’shem shomayim!
Choose life! It will change the world.
This is applied chassidus at its best.
Definition of terms:
Chassidus is the skills or tools that the Rebbeim bequeathed to us; the conduit by which we connect to Hashem. If we could separate the words applied and chassidus (which I don’t think we can), chassidus would be the academic part and the applied part is how we incorporate those skills into our daily lives.
Applied chassidus:
- Is to be applied to a person, not to a situation, disease or problem.
- Is changing to a person, the way they think, and therefore speak and act.
- Is applied only to me.
- Is simple, straightforward and readily understood.
- Is something that resonates within us as emes.
- Is to learn more about who I am.
- Is to live in Geula.
- Is not applied if one is not willing to change.
- Is not a ‘wow’ that others can feel when the story is told.
- Is not a solution to anything.
- Is not obvious until pointed out.
Applied chassidus, in the case of this essay, is how choice can be applied, as our Rebbeim suggest it can, to our everyday lives.
Please note that this essay may appear to be incredibly simple and obvious, but that is the beauty of applied chassidus; simple, obvious, straightforward and resonating within each of us as something to which we say: “Everyone knows that!”.